Caring for your Male kitten

Hi Mum, it’s Caramac here. I’m really handsome, and I think you are very lucky to have me. Once you have got to know me, I know you will agree! I am a very sloppy little boy!

I like Kitten Whiskas Supermeat in tins, mixed with Whiskas chunks in Jelly, Chicken, Tuna and Salmon (about half and half, well mashed up,) with a little good quality raw beef mince sprinkled over the top, three times a day. I also have Hills Feline Growth or Royal Canin Kitten 34 biscuits left down all the time (a good idea during the day in Summer, because the flies don’t like them) with plenty of fresh water and (NOT MILK, unless it is pasteurised Goat’s milk!), left down at all times for me to drink (and paddle in!) Mum got very cross when I did that. She called me a “Tucky Moad!” As If! If I want a little more food, don’t worry, as I will tell you, very loudly. Please, DO NOT CHANGE the food I am used to. Once I have settled in, if you want me to have something different, then please introduce it very gradually, a little bit at a time, into my usual diet. Mum said you would be very sorry if you didn’t follow this advice!

I have been wormed. Mum used Panacur Paste wormer, and I was “done” at 6, 8, and 10 weeks, then I had Kitten Stronghold when I was 12 weeks old. This also kills any fleas or mites, so she uses this on all her cats and kittens, about every six weeks. This is essential if you have other pets for me to play with, which go out, or for me if I am allowed to play in the garden with you, providing it is an “escape-proof” one. If you do let me out, it would be a good idea to get me micro-chipped, in case I get lost. My Parents are PKD DNA tested negative, and have both been blood-tested for FELV, and found negative. My Annual Booster is due in September 2007.

It is said, that Divorce and moving house, are two of the biggest causes of stress. Well, just think about that for the moment. I have just divorced my old parents, and I’ve moved house! When you get me home, please show me where my litter tray is – I am used to one with a hood (less messy, old Mum used to say, ‘cos I like digging to Australia!). Make sure I have a bed, or leave me in my travelling case, with my food and water near me. I want to be friends with everyone, but please don’t all rush to say “Hello”, let me rest and settle down, and get used to all the new smells and sights. If we are going to watch TV, I will need another litter tray in the room, as I might be too scared to go and find the other one, and we don’t want any “Liddle accidents”, do we?

When I was very young, Mum used to groom me with her hands, to get me used to it. Now I am used to being combed with one that has two different lengths of teeth, and a small slicker brush to brush my fur up the wrong way. If the fur on my chest and tummy gets greasy, she used a non-scented baby powder, and rubbed it well in to my fur, then made sure she brushed it all out, with a bristle brush. She says I must be groomed every single day; otherwise I will get “Matted”. She also wipes my eyes with a little bit of moist cotton wool when they need it; to get rid of any brown “Tear Stains”

I am a loving little cat, but a bit of a wimp when it comes to vacuum cleaners, unless they are quiet ones. I will try to kill them, but it doesn’t work, because they still come out the following day!

I will help you with the brush and dustpan and washing the floors though – I love helping with that, even though she used to say I was more of a hindrance!

2.

I cry very loudly when I don’t know where everyone is, especially when I’ve just woken up from a catnap. The old Mum used to say, “For Heaven’s sake Mac, anyone would think you were being killed.” It works you know, as she always came to see what the matter was!

I’m afraid I have been very spoilt! I was allowed on her bed, and sometimes she used to let me have some of her dinner, if she thought I would like it. I love chicken, and her ham “samwidges” were scrummy!

Please don’t waste a lot of pennies on fancy beds and stuff. I love chasing tape measures, and table tennis balls. I need lots of those because they kept going under the furniture. We certainly knew how to wind her up. She’d spend hours rescuing them all, but in five minutes flat, we’d made them all disappear again! I love little furry “Meeces” to play with, watch me kill ‘em! Most important of all is a scratching post, but it must be covered with SISAL rope. I had one with a platform on top that I could sleep on, if the bedroom door was closed and “He” was sleeping in MY chair. You do have to watch these humans!

Please be very careful with what disinfectant you use to clean my litter tray out with. Use Savlon, or a special cat one, ‘cos lots of disinfectants are poisonous to cats! I am used to the World’s Best Cat litter.

If I am not going out, please will you clip my nails? Even a scratching post does not stop them getting long, so they catch in things. Mum did it every month, usually just after I had climbed up her legs, to see what she was doing. She said it was to “save the furniture”, but the furniture didn’t yell like that, so I think she was telling “Porky Pies!”

She used to just clip off the hooked part of my claws with her nail clippers.

If you have to give me a pill at any time, try wrapping it up in a piece of ham, or mince, or even cover it with a meat or fishy paste. If I am too cute to be caught with a trick like that, then you’ll have to resort to “Brute Strength“ - wrap me up tight, in a large towel, open my mouth and drop the pill as far down the back of my throat as you can, close my mouth, then stroke my throat with my head back, until you see me swallow.

When I am about 7 or 8 months old, I will have to go to my Doctor to be “Castigated”, if you have bought me as a Pet. I don’t know what that means, but she assures me that I will be a happier and healthier little man afterwards.

If you want any help or advice in looking after me in the way in which I have been accustomed, please don’t hesitate to contact her. She will want to know how I am getting on, and if I’m being “GOOD”! I promised her I would behave myself.

Looking forward to a long and loving friendship,

Yours

Caramac

XXX

P.S. PLEASE KEEP UP MY INSURANCE, AT LEAST FOR THE FIRST YEAR, JUST IN CASE!